It’s easy to get caught up with the sounds of wedding bells and the flapping of dove’s wings while you are planning your wedding, and in those plans, sometimes your relationship with your significant other can be put on the back burner.
Logically we all know that this is no way to start off the lifelong commitment of marriage, but let’s face it, sometimes when we get to planning the wedding, all logic flies out the window!
Brides and grooms often lose sight of the thing that led them to become engaged in the first place before they say “I do,” and often that can lead to an “I don’t” once they are faced with forever on the big day. So, how do you keep in touch with the relationship and each other, even if you are caught up in the planning?
How do you keep both feet firmly planted on the ground?
20 Best Things For Your Relationship After You Get Engaged:
- Love the good and the bad. You fell in love with the whole package; so if you soon to be isn’t a planner and steps out of the planning, don’t beat them up over it because you knew they weren’t a planner when you agreed to marry them! Ask them where they want to be involved and embrace the fact that there is a place for them to help out!
- Listen to each other before you listen to others. There is only room for you and your mate in your marriage, so now is a great time to really learn to rely on each other when making decisions and kick the others out of your proverbial bedroom!
- Alleviate the stress by prioritizing. Whether that means a warm bath, yoga, a walk or a jog make sure that you do what you need to do to keep the stress down so as you get closer to the wedding date you will feel better and look better.
- Laugh, laugh and laugh some more. Laughter is the best medicine. Be silly together and keep each other laughing and smiling. This will keep you close and intimate while you are engaged.
- Keep your dreams alive. Start a journal or a board together that has your bucket list of dreams. Work on it once a week. This will keep you in touch with each other and help you define your goals as a couple.
- Share your finances. This doesn’t mean you have to comingle, but it does mean you should not hide debt and you do need to be honest about spending, saving and what you both expect for the future. Money is one of the biggest reasons that couples don’t work out, so put it all out there in the open.
- Date night. No matter how busy you are with planning, work, family, and life still make time for date night. It gives you a time to reconnect and rekindle together. It will remind you why you became engaged and want to be married.
- Don’t give up your friends. It’s great to have couple friends, and inevitably you will adopt one set of your friends to be closer to, but keep your own friends and be sure you have your own interests. It keeps you interesting and gives you something to talk about. No two people can spend all their time together!
- Compliment each other. When your significant other sees that you notice the little things they feel loved, wanted and appreciated.
- Be biased. You got engaged for a reason! It’s okay to be biased about your guy or gal. Shout it and show it to the world and not only will they love you all the more for it, but it will keep things strong for you.
- Don’t nag about the planning. If you aren’t getting cooperation from your guy when it comes to the planning, it’s far easier for you to suggest and make it seem like it’s his idea than to nag.
- Keep the television off in the bedroom. You are both tired, but you have to keep things spicy. The time of being engaged is the time when you should both be all over that, so don’t let the pre-wedding stress take that bliss away.
- Keep the television off in the bedroom. I know, I just said that, but this is for a different reason! The bedroom isn’t just for making love, use that time for your intimate conversations, whether it’s to reconnect, talk about your day or just chat about life. This is sometimes the perfect time to take a deep breath and have your best heart-to-hearts.
- Keep listening. It’s so important that you hear each other and that you ask questions. A relationship can’t be one-sided, so be sure you listen as much as you speak.
- Kiss every morning and every night. People will tell you to never go to bed angry and to a certain extent this is true, but sometimes you can’t work it out with words. But, if you can kiss that can turn anger into passion and that can also dispel hurt feelings.
- Even if you hate it, do it sometimes. You might hate to fish and he might hate to go to a movie, but do it sometimes. You have a very long life together, and while you are engaged, humor each other and do some of these things together. You might find that you actually enjoy them!
- Let them do things alone. You hate to fish and he hates the movies, so let them also go and do them without you there! You have to trust each other. It’s a delicate balance, so use the time that you are engaged to find that balance.
- Some things should stay private. Just like they say you shouldn’t mix business and pleasure, some of the longest lasting marriages I know have told me the secret to their success is that they have never used the bathroom in front of each other.
- Dress for success. This might sound 1950’s to you, but every once in a while you should both get out of your sweats and get dressed up and go out on the town. First, it makes you feel better and second you will look at each other in a whole new appreciative way.
- Never ask if you look fat, your butt looks big or do you like my mother. I don’t think this needs explaining, do you?
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